Q. Why did Nick get sent home from work yesterday morning?
A. Because he threw up on a customer.
I choked on the class of milk I was drinking when he told me. He works as a salesman at a fancy motorcycle and atv store. Apparently Nick was the lucky one picked by the man who lives in the wilderness, hunts and kills his own food and lives off the land to help him. So after a week of not bathing after skinning carcasses and living in the woods, his ATV breaks down and he needs a new one. Guess he didn't feel the need to clean up before going into a business establishment. I wonder if he realizes he's stinky now?
Also amazing is this:
Marijuana is now legal in Alaska, and not just for medicinal purposes. It is now legal to have up to 4 ounces (and this is quite a lot) in your house. They are now trying to get the initiative passed that would make laws for the state to legally cultivate, regulate, and tax pot. This will be the first of its kind in the entire world. Even Holland has certain penalties for pot. I don't know what they are but they are rarely enforced (according to what I read). I wonder if all the people who are against Marijuana solely on the basis that its illegal (as in, they are ok with Alcohol consumption, caffeine, sleeping pills, smoking cigarettes, etc) would treat it the same if it became legal in the state they lived in...possibly even try it.
Whether it even becomes legal or not, I think the government should waste less tax dollars trying to punish people for it and maybe use the money for something useful...like actually fullfilling the financial obligations set forth in the "Leave No Child Behind" Act. According to my co-worker, Mike D who is in school to become a math teacher, the Act made by the Bush Administration calls for extra funding if a certain porportion of children aren't passing those stupid standardized tests for two years. And if the kids still aren't doing well after the 2 years, the funding is cut. Of course this was passed, its a great idea and it would provide for better education...even the title makes people like it. But according to Mike, VERY few of the schools promised this money actually got it because even though we are getting further and further into national debt, Bush didn't allocate hardly any money for the program. Remember that in November...even though I know all you guys are smart enough not to vote for him anyways because you've watched the news occasionally in the last 4 years.
And, as long as I'm on a rant about Bush, read the following artical from the State Press last week, its awesome:
Alamoodi: Decision 2004-- The Bin Laden Vote
by Yaser Alamoodi
Every four years our presidential election reminds us how lucky we are to live in a true democracy. As the race heats up, we grow curious about other people's choices of who will steer our country for the next term. We sometimes take note of friends, family members, entertainers and athletes when they speak of their preference. Yet no person, if given the chance, could pique my curiosity more than Osama bin Laden.
Bin Laden would make an interesting case study in the field of voting patterns. Assuming that he was an American citizen, he would be faced with two primary choices. A fast review of his politics could help us speculate as to where his vote would end up.
His stance on women's rights is obvious. He is firmly against any notion of gender equality, (including any reproductive rights) since that's within the male sphere of dominance. Furthermore, any advocacy of feminist ideas should be crushed for fear it might undermine family values, or what's left of them.
Gay marriages should be opposed at all costs, bin Laden might say, since it's immoral, inhuman and threatens heterosexual marriage's peace and harmony. He would probably support another attempt at a constitutional ban. If it fails again, well, hopefully AIDS will take care of them.
Bin Laden always wants to be a tough guy, so military campaigns are foremost on his mind. He would go to war for unconfirmed threats just to prove a point or for nothing at all. Feeling the heat from his own people or his allies would not stop him. As far as he is concerned, he is on a divine mission and he will prevail. Human sacrifices from both sides just add to the glory of his mission.
Judging by the scholastic standards in Afghanistan, education is not really of great concern to bin Laden. A lot of it goes to waste and no military gains from it. If any problems arise, faith-based initiatives will take care of it. After all, everybody dies some day; in the hereafter only sacred knowledge will save you.
Nothing would piss off bin Laden more than separation of religion and politics. To him, secular politics is nothing but a big Jewish conspiracy to undermine his holy war against evildoers. On the road to heaven, there are passengers and there are drivers. Secularist should keep out of the car.
For a guy who built his own trans-national militia, gun ownership is a clear choice. Bin Laden is for any endeavor to ease the possession of guns, rockets and tanks, since the constitution does not specify what the word "arms" means. To him, guns don't kill people, they only kill people who threaten our manhood by taking our weapons away, and rightfully so.
As for the economy, bin Laden would invite us to take a look at him. The financial backer of terrorism would argue for free enterprise and less government intervention. Economic disparities to him would seem insignificant, normal, or even fair, 'cause poor people are lazy. Terms like the "haves" and the "have-nots" would remind him of communist propaganda. Even though it's no longer a threat, it's still a possibility.
If given the choice, bin Laden would definitely replace Al Jazeera with Fox News. He would divide up the world into "us" versus "them" camps, like he did in his caves. Idealist as always, he might consider a cultural war to save the world. Certainly, bin Laden would accuse his critics of giving "comfort to the enemy" or would just ignore them. Now, how do you think bin Laden would vote in November?
yaser.alamoodi@hotmail.com
So yeah, that's enough of that. Check out this pic of Super Sexy Mike
That was taken at the Ren Fest this year, that leather coat costs like $700 so we just took a picture instead.
A. Because he threw up on a customer.
I choked on the class of milk I was drinking when he told me. He works as a salesman at a fancy motorcycle and atv store. Apparently Nick was the lucky one picked by the man who lives in the wilderness, hunts and kills his own food and lives off the land to help him. So after a week of not bathing after skinning carcasses and living in the woods, his ATV breaks down and he needs a new one. Guess he didn't feel the need to clean up before going into a business establishment. I wonder if he realizes he's stinky now?
Also amazing is this:
Marijuana is now legal in Alaska, and not just for medicinal purposes. It is now legal to have up to 4 ounces (and this is quite a lot) in your house. They are now trying to get the initiative passed that would make laws for the state to legally cultivate, regulate, and tax pot. This will be the first of its kind in the entire world. Even Holland has certain penalties for pot. I don't know what they are but they are rarely enforced (according to what I read). I wonder if all the people who are against Marijuana solely on the basis that its illegal (as in, they are ok with Alcohol consumption, caffeine, sleeping pills, smoking cigarettes, etc) would treat it the same if it became legal in the state they lived in...possibly even try it.
Whether it even becomes legal or not, I think the government should waste less tax dollars trying to punish people for it and maybe use the money for something useful...like actually fullfilling the financial obligations set forth in the "Leave No Child Behind" Act. According to my co-worker, Mike D who is in school to become a math teacher, the Act made by the Bush Administration calls for extra funding if a certain porportion of children aren't passing those stupid standardized tests for two years. And if the kids still aren't doing well after the 2 years, the funding is cut. Of course this was passed, its a great idea and it would provide for better education...even the title makes people like it. But according to Mike, VERY few of the schools promised this money actually got it because even though we are getting further and further into national debt, Bush didn't allocate hardly any money for the program. Remember that in November...even though I know all you guys are smart enough not to vote for him anyways because you've watched the news occasionally in the last 4 years.
And, as long as I'm on a rant about Bush, read the following artical from the State Press last week, its awesome:
Alamoodi: Decision 2004-- The Bin Laden Vote
by Yaser Alamoodi
Every four years our presidential election reminds us how lucky we are to live in a true democracy. As the race heats up, we grow curious about other people's choices of who will steer our country for the next term. We sometimes take note of friends, family members, entertainers and athletes when they speak of their preference. Yet no person, if given the chance, could pique my curiosity more than Osama bin Laden.
Bin Laden would make an interesting case study in the field of voting patterns. Assuming that he was an American citizen, he would be faced with two primary choices. A fast review of his politics could help us speculate as to where his vote would end up.
His stance on women's rights is obvious. He is firmly against any notion of gender equality, (including any reproductive rights) since that's within the male sphere of dominance. Furthermore, any advocacy of feminist ideas should be crushed for fear it might undermine family values, or what's left of them.
Gay marriages should be opposed at all costs, bin Laden might say, since it's immoral, inhuman and threatens heterosexual marriage's peace and harmony. He would probably support another attempt at a constitutional ban. If it fails again, well, hopefully AIDS will take care of them.
Bin Laden always wants to be a tough guy, so military campaigns are foremost on his mind. He would go to war for unconfirmed threats just to prove a point or for nothing at all. Feeling the heat from his own people or his allies would not stop him. As far as he is concerned, he is on a divine mission and he will prevail. Human sacrifices from both sides just add to the glory of his mission.
Judging by the scholastic standards in Afghanistan, education is not really of great concern to bin Laden. A lot of it goes to waste and no military gains from it. If any problems arise, faith-based initiatives will take care of it. After all, everybody dies some day; in the hereafter only sacred knowledge will save you.
Nothing would piss off bin Laden more than separation of religion and politics. To him, secular politics is nothing but a big Jewish conspiracy to undermine his holy war against evildoers. On the road to heaven, there are passengers and there are drivers. Secularist should keep out of the car.
For a guy who built his own trans-national militia, gun ownership is a clear choice. Bin Laden is for any endeavor to ease the possession of guns, rockets and tanks, since the constitution does not specify what the word "arms" means. To him, guns don't kill people, they only kill people who threaten our manhood by taking our weapons away, and rightfully so.
As for the economy, bin Laden would invite us to take a look at him. The financial backer of terrorism would argue for free enterprise and less government intervention. Economic disparities to him would seem insignificant, normal, or even fair, 'cause poor people are lazy. Terms like the "haves" and the "have-nots" would remind him of communist propaganda. Even though it's no longer a threat, it's still a possibility.
If given the choice, bin Laden would definitely replace Al Jazeera with Fox News. He would divide up the world into "us" versus "them" camps, like he did in his caves. Idealist as always, he might consider a cultural war to save the world. Certainly, bin Laden would accuse his critics of giving "comfort to the enemy" or would just ignore them. Now, how do you think bin Laden would vote in November?
yaser.alamoodi@hotmail.com
So yeah, that's enough of that. Check out this pic of Super Sexy Mike
That was taken at the Ren Fest this year, that leather coat costs like $700 so we just took a picture instead.
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